Type B Personality
a. Type B Personality Extrinsic Characteristics (Stress or Fear Related)
Type B personality trait’s main extrinsic characteristic is Honesty. This trait combines trust and fairness and yields great pleasures, but difficult to manage.
But Honesty is not exactly what you may think. It is not the truth of a statement or action. It is the belief in its truth, which is far more elusive and difficult to assess.
That is where “actions speak louder than words,” comes into play. It’s one of many management tools used to gauge honesty.
But, knowing how to manage these tools is critical. Click on the Read More link below to learn valuable techniques.
Classifying extrinsic factors as “fear related” means that they are common stress sources.
1. Honesty. It is the interrelationship or bond between people. Take the example of a person who finds a diamond ring in the street, picks it up, and takes it to the police station. There is no interrelationship or bond between people in that action. Returning the ring would describe a noble act, but does little to highlight the interrelationship between people.
A better example would be two girls remaining friends during good and bad times. One friend announces that she is engaged. But the other friend saw her fiancé making out with someone else. An honest friend would tell her what she saw (trust), withhold making any judgment (fairness), and then stand beside her for comfort.
Another example would be where one person asks another to hold an heirloom ring while he/she leaves the state on a business trip. The person accepts the task. A few days later, that person loses the ring. They end up finding another that looks exactly like the one lost. It is possible that it is the same ring. When the owner returns, the person holding the ring tells the owner what had happened.
Both of these examples have interrelationships, and both have elements of trust and fairness. In the second example, life-long friends could easily be established simply on the basis of honesty.
There are hundreds of ways to assess if someone is honest. But beware. You may be wrong, particularly when done in haste. Here are some examples:
- Does falsity of what is said determines honesty? No it does not. This is one of the biggest mistake people make. A person can say something false but still be honest. Honesty deals with what someone believes to be true and not what the facts prove. Facts may forms beliefs, but do create them. A friend may hear something on social media and believe it true. If they repeat the information they can still be honest even when the information is false. It is your obligation to ask your friend about the source of the information.
How many times have you concluded that someone was dishonest because the facts did not back them up. That would mean that during the middle ages the vast majority of the people were dishonest because they thought the earth was the center of the Universe.
2. Saying something nice to someone when you want something. This is closer to determining dishonest intent, but it is not there yet. It also shows that truth is not the determining factor, i.e. the “saying something nice” may be factually true, but still be dishonest.
The person saying something nice may not be connecting the statement to the action. You must ask or investigate that connection before jumping to a conclusion.
3. Show up late and miss deadlines. This is evidence of dishonesty, but does not define it. In order to connect the action you must ask the question: “Why are you always late?” You might find out that your parties and deadlines are intentionally set earlier than intended.
4. Action Speak louder than Words. This is the gold standard in determining honesty and its flip-side dishonesty.
It’s similar to a teeter totter with statements on one end and actions on other. When the actions do not support the statements, then the teeter totter broadcasts the mismatch.
But, there is a down-side. Most people puff the statements and applying a blanket rule could result in a loss of friendships.
The B Types have wisely learned how to manage any mismatch by forgiving minor discrepancies and ignoring those that are not important.
2. Control/Power. All personality types use power and control to accomplish a result. But B-types use and enjoy different aspects. For example, most Type B personalities receives more satisfaction out of the interrelations (aka the “chase”) rather than from acquiring something (aka the “win”). The win is important, but mostly as a means to acquire more chases.
A race horse runs down the track determined to beat the other horses. The horse does not realize when they cross the finish line, so the win is not important. The thrill is beating the brown and white filly next to her.
In this sense, the Type B person can be extremely competitive while still enjoying the interactions.
Rapport Power. The Type B personalities are exceptional salespersons. The power comes from a desire to influence the buyers to “like them,” as opposed to the selling of a product. Creating this type of bond encourages repeat business. This is much more profitable to the company than a single sale. Hence, companies seek out salespeople having this B-type trait.
A person may initially acquire insurance based on the price, but they renew with the company because of a friendship with the insurance agent. If an insurance company requires their agents to take a personality test, you now know why.
Sexual power. Type B salespeople use sexual prowess in almost every initial meeting. It is used to keep the buyer from running away. It is the old “foot-in-the-door” maneuver. A friendship cannot begin without getting a chance to give your name. Training seminars teach that the average salesperson has less than ten seconds to establish rapport.
Communication power should be renamed “Type B” power. They observe nuances that are invisible to most people. The eye contact, muscle tension, a glance, arm position, how far the lips are parted, along with a long list of other manifestations. They observe all of these features and tailor their words and content to play into or sway the direction of the conversation. A memorized script would be spotted in less than a few seconds, so the salesperson must be flexible with the responses. Flexibility is very difficult for most people, but it’s child’s play to the Type B personalities. This is one of the reasons they are successful attorneys. They know how to ask questions to nudge witnesses in a certain direction.
3. Easy Going. As used here, easygoing means not easily stressed by what others say or do. Some say it means laid back. That’s misleading. It is more accurate to say that they have mastered the ability to manage stress during conversations. These skills require training, experience, and intelligence.
High energy and easy going are not inconsistent expressions.
The highest energy person known in the entertainment world was Robin Williams. Yet he was also easy going. Rather than getting stressed when a restaurant had no available seating, he would insist on waiting his turn like everyone else. Sometimes he would grab a white napkin and roam around the restaurant taking orders to the delight of the patrons and owners.
Most Type B people are not overwhelmed by life’s everyday problems. This makes them among the most heart healthy of all personality types. Being healthy in turn reduces stress creating a fitness circle.
4. Enthusiasm. Type B personalities are highly enthusiastic in activities that involve other people. There are many words that define enthusiasm, and each one provides a slightly different flavor. Can you imagine a musician without passion, a leader without charisma, or an artist without creativity? This is why most musicians, leaders and artists are B-types.
When invited to a party a Type B person enjoys meeting new people. Many strive to become the “life of the party,” as it results in invitations to an expanding list of more parties. To avoid the impression that B-types are only party animals, look a little deeper and think about how many business contacts are made at a party.
Garth Brooks went to Nashville to be discovered. He was one of thousands of very talented artist trying to be discovered. He lasted one day before returning home. But when he was performing at a party, he bumped into a record producer. He went on to become one of the largest money making artists of all time. This is the value of a chance meeting.
This example illustrates why enthusiasm has been classified as an extrinsic trait. Sometimes there is a little stress that tags along.
5. Humor. Humor from others is used to reduce stress in all personality types. But what about the personality type that produces humor? When viewed in that direction, Type B individuals dominate the area. Every school, business, geographic region, etc. has people who enjoy making other people laugh.
Will Rogers was a Cherokee Indian from Oklahoma. He was an actor, vaudeville performer, cowboy, newspaper columnist and politician as well as being the most admired and quoted humorist in America. In 1928, he ran for president on the “Anti-Bunk” party. He pledged that, if elected, he would resign the next day. Herbert Hoover won and the next day this Oklahoma man resigned. This was during tough times when the nation really needed some humor. He is discussed in one of the inspiring stories of Oklahoma.
6. Spontaneous. This is the inclination to do things without premeditation in an open, natural, or uninhibited manner. People living in a regimented, safe bubble are both repulsed by and enticed by such actions. The repulsion occurs when the spontaneous event is occurring, fed by the terror of not knowing what may come next. The enticement comes from the feeling of exhilaration after the event is over.
As an example, the flat part of a roller coaster is not as enjoyable as the free-fall drop, as evidenced by photos of the faces of riders at the two locations.
Life would be on the dull side without a generous sprinkling of B-types throughout the populous.
b. Type B Personality Intrinsic Characteristics (Joy Related)
Friends, friends and more friends is the main Intrinsic Trait. Most view money, power, and fame as good qualities. But this personality find them unimportant if they cannot be shared with someone.
Everyone knows someone who has a Type B Personality. Look around where people gather. It is usually the person who stands out, who clearly enjoys being the center of social circles, and who is talkative. If you want to be like him or her, you likely have the same type B traits.
What is the first step in finding a friend? Is it eye contact, a smile, a question, or something else.
The answer is: It is something else. To discover this gem and many others, click on the Read More link below.
1. Having Friends. Humans are social animals. Interactions are necessary in order to supply meaning to life.
- Friends teach friends. Friends promote friends. Friends help friends. Friends cure loneliness. And Friends often form strong romantic bonds.
In most animal species the social animal outlives the isolated animal. In humans, at age 50 married people live longer than singles: 70% longer in France, 30% longer in Belgium, and 40% longer in the Netherlands. Your health is saying find and nourish friendships.
How do you go about finding friends? This question depends on many factors including the traditions and norms of the region and country, the ages, the reason for finding friends, etc. As such, there is no golden rule. However, here are a few guidelines.
a. You must first address your fears. This is generally covered in the What are Your Fears section. The main fear relates to rejection. There are others such as fear of touching, talking, catching a disease, etc. But these are rare and nowhere near the level of fear of rejection.
There are also physical impairments that can play a role in some people, such as stuttering, tongue tied, etc., and that raises the fear of embarrassment. This is addressed in the read more section of Public Speaking Fears.
If these fears are not sufficiently calmed, you may want to start out on secure social media sites. But, person-to-person contact is far better in making friends. Talking to the TV is not personal.
Next, you need to go where people are. The social media platforms provides an alternate. But, studies have shown that long-term friendships are established by person to person contacts. That means losing friends found on social media is to be expected and should not be taken as a personal rejection.
b. The next move is to make eye contact. If they do not see you, it reduces your chances of making a connection. If you develop eye contact, then you must make some assessments. Eye contact less than a half-second does not count. The one-second rule means direct eye-to-eye contact lasting at least one second means a potential connection.
c. Next is a friendly response. This could be a simple smile, a nod, or many other manifestations.
d. The next steps depend on the reasons for the initial contact. There are simply too many different and appropriate actions depending on the reasons and circumstances.
Hopefully this will blossom into a true friendship.
2. Compassion. Compassion is sympathy for the suffering of others. This is an interrelationship issue and a foremost trait in Type B personalities. The number one reason for people to go into medicine is not for the money. It is because of compassion.
Dr. Jonas Salk wanted to help people and chose to work in the laboratory, a low paying underappreciated arm of medicine. The polio vaccine was discovered because of compassion.
Edward Jenner in 1796 sought to reduce small-pox the world’s deadliest disease. He discovered that “variolae vaccinae” in cows provided an immunity to milk farmers. Dr. Jenner intentionally infected people with cow pox and eliminated small pox in humans. The word vaccine came from variolae vaccinae.
All religious beliefs have compassion as a basic tenant.
3. Dreamer. The dictionary defines a dreamer as one who lives in a world of fancy and imagination. This defines all amusement parks. Throw in romance novels and the B-type personality blossoms. Then there are the science fiction movies and the “power of the force.” Although the primary purpose of these dreamers is to imagine it produces a trillion dollar revenue stream as a by-product.
“IF YOU CAN DREAM IT, YOU CAN DO IT.” Walt Disney.
4. Patience. This is the capacity to tolerate delay without confronting stress. This is another trait that calms. It does not mean to accept laziness or apathy. Those are issues of competence and not patience.
5. Roamer. This is taking different routes or going to an unspecified destination. Some people take the fastest or shortest route every time. They seek to go from point A to point B in the fasted time or cheapest cost. The roamer sometimes says, “I will go this way and see what I see.” Or, they may say, “Why do I have go to point B at all?”
This quandary faces almost everyone who retires. And, it is not easy to unlearn. Therefore, try practicing being a roamer a few years before retiring. To spice it up, combine roaming with spontaneity.
c. How to Appeal to a Type B Person.
This personality type wears their emotions on their sleeves. As such, it is not difficult to find what appeals to them.
Since they enjoy having people around them, organize a picture taking event with lots of people. The cherry on top would be having a celebrity drop by. They will put that picture on their wall and admire it every day. AND, your name will be associated with that picture.
Click on the Read More link to discover other unexpected things you can do for a friend that will be remembered.
Special gift or Award. The object of the gift or award is to:
- recognize his/her accomplishments;
- be unexpected; and
- is unique.
Here’s a couple of hidden gems. Find out who the mayor is of the small town where your friend grew up. Prepare a nice certificate entitled “In Recognition of the Person of the Year from (name of Town and state)” and signed by the Mayor. Experience has shown that all small town mayors will sign the certificate. Present your friend with the certificate at a party or event.
This following would go well at a retirement party. Obtain a nice photo of the head of the retiree, and blow it up to life size. Glue the life size head to a flat stick and give one to each person at the party without the retiree knowing. Have the president or higher manager congratulate the retiree but say their are having a problem finding a replacement. At that moment have everyone attending the party pulls the life-size photo up to their faces so it looks like a sea of identical retiring persons in the room.
Be a Good Listener. A good listener is high on the Type B’s must-have list. The words, “Wow, that’s interesting. Tell me more,” are irresistible.
Praise of any kind is appreciated. Awards that acknowledge the person rather than the accomplishments are preferred. A plaque that states “best liked person” is better than a more expensive pen set or gold watch.
If you invite the Type B person to have their picture taken with a celebrity, they will often modestly decline, saying, “It’s not necessary,” or “I don’t want to bother them.” They mean the exact opposite. They love the association with a famous person and will display the picture in their office and on the home mantle.
d. Weaknesses and Vulnerabilities
To find a weakness find their strengths. The greater the strength the greater the weakness.
The greatest strength of this personality trait is having friends. Where is the weakness in having friends?
This is an example of the answer being in plain sight. It is the fear of loosing friends or being disliked.
They will do almost anything to try and please others exposing a major vulnerable, particularly in business matters. These topics are addressed in more detail in the Read More link below.
1. Perception of Being Disliked. By far the greatest weakness with Type B personality is not being able to please everyone. In business meetings and dealings, it is often a ploy to bait the other into thinking that you are unhappy. Type B people are inclined to give up something in order to get the others to like them. There is a clue that reveals a bait tactic. After the person declares their unhappiness, they stop talking and stare. They are waiting for the B-type person to concede something. If you are that person, there is a solution. You get them to talk, by asking, “Why are you unhappy?” Or, you can try the adult version of the “quiet game.” All management courses on negotiation tactics list silence as the strongest tool. Not simply a tool, but the strongest tool. This flows into the next weakness.
2. Procrastination. Procrastination is the difficulty of staying on task or finishing a task before moving on to something more interesting. Is not the same as delaying or postponing a decision because of the need for more information. If this problem becomes pervasive, some corrective action should be done. A computer search for help with procrastination reveals hundreds of apps. Many of which are free. If procrastination becomes too much of a burden, a solution is to delegate the tasks to someone. Delegating is a difficult thing to do master, but it is essential if the tasks are not being completed.
3. Talkative. One of the biggest reasons why B-types are the life-of-the-party is that they are talkers. In their mind, a quiet party is a boring party. However, in a business transaction, fun is not the objective. The person who talks the most almost always concedes the most. This is the reason why a Type B person should have someone assist them in business negotiations.
A talent scout was negotiating with a talented female singer in a private booth at a restaurant over a glass of wine. The talent scout asked why she came to their agency. She replied, “Because you are the best agency in the business. My dream is to concentrate on hip hop music genre.”
There are several problems with this scenario. First, the person who is in the weaker position should never negotiate in a relaxed atmosphere over a glass of alcohol. Second, the singer needed to listen more and talk less. In this case, there was no business reason to inform the talent scout that she wanted to concentrate on hip hop music. It turned out that there was a low demand for hip-hop singers at the time, so the talent scout chose not to accept the client.
Almost all lawyers tell their witnesses that they should not volunteer information during a deposition or trial. This is because words convey information and information is power. By giving the other side information, they can choose to use or not to use that information. But, if you do not give them information, you take away their power not to use it. Here is an example.
You are in a deposition and the other side asks, Did you sign this release absolving my client of all responsibility?
And you answered, Yes I signed the release, but they had a gun to my head at the time.
You just volunteered the gun-to-your-head information. If you did not volunteer that information, the other side would have made a big issue about the release at the time of trial. Your explanation would have been devastating to their case and their credibility. By giving them this information, you gave them the power not to use it.
When a lawyer uses the words “do not volunteer” it is a code word meaning stop talking. This is very difficult for a Type B person.
4. Loneliness. This is defined, by those who study this condition, as feeling lonely more than once per week. Solitary confinement must be particularly difficult on a B-type. The COVID-19 shelter-in-place order is likely to take its toll on these individuals.
A study of the blood cells taken from individuals diagnosed as lonely showed that they were in a state of high alert, similar to those blood cells fighting bacterial infections. This makes loneliness particularly detrimental to the health of Type B people. It also suggests that they may be drawn to drug use based on physical needs as well as psychological influences. It further raises the possibility that the cure may be group-type therapies.
5. Criticism is a major problem with all personality types, but it is particularly hurtful to the Type B personalities. A major conflict exists with social media. It is a source of praise and a source for criticism. When criticism appears, one solution is to ignore it. Another is to look for hidden benefits. In most instances it is best not to respond. If you are inclined to respond, it is important to wait a sufficient amount of time for the emotions to subside before answering.