FEAR AND JOY PAIRING

Pairing

Pairing is the selecting of a Joy that works best to reduce a particular Fear. 

The analysis below is to be used as a guide.  There is no need to fill out a form like the one shown.  

This Table is only to be used to suggest ideas on various joys that might help.  Once you get the general idea, then pick the Joy that brings you the most pleasure.  If you have two or three equally pleasurable Joys, then you might drift in the direction that may help cure your particular fear(s).  

You do not have to select the Joy as one of those that you will adopt and use.   You might choose a  Joy only to help reduce a particular fear.  Once the fear is reduced, you may choose to drop it.   A prime example is using the Amusement Ride Joy to help reduce anxiety with the public speaking fear.  It may only take 5 times to re-associate the Adrenaline rush with safety and fun. 

THIS IS FOR ILLUSTRATION PURPOSES ONLY.
Table 1. Joy Selection for the Fear of Spiders​
Action Information Type of Joy to Use

First thing that popped into your head

Getting Bit

Camping, Gardening, Fishing, Hunting, Hiking, National Parks

Death or Injury

Sports, Volunteering (Hospital, Hospice), Amusement Park Rides, Rock Climbing, Flying, Parachuting, Going to Church.

Infection/Illness

Camping, Gardening, Volunteering (Hospital or clinic).

Unclean

Camping, Gardening, Fishing, Hiking, Hunting, National Parks

It was ugly.

Photography, Volunteering at a zoo, Pet Associated Entities.

Danger to Others

Camping, Gardening, Fishing, Hiking, Hunting, National Parks, Sports, Going to Church.

What did you do?

Scream

Amusement Park Rides, Singing, Music, Sporting Events, Anything with Babies, Meditation.

Run

Sports, Cardio Vascular Activities, Canoeing.

Throw Something

Sports, Bocce Ball.

Freeze

Dancing, Sports, Cardio Vascular Activities, Auto Racing

Why did you do that?
To get away from danger.
Chess, Amusement Parks, Camping, Sports, Attending Church Services.
A cry for Help.
Sports, (any activity or game requiring teamwork), Meditation, Going to Church
To Defend yourself.
Chess, Sports, Camping
To Kill the Spider
Fencing (swords), Hunting, Skeet shooting, Going to Church.
To Hide.
Any activities involving others, Meditation, Dancing
What did you See?
The Spider
Photography
The Spider Web
Photography
Fast moving Spider
Car racing, Amusement Park rides, Birds of Prey Hobbies.
Spider Staring at You.
Meditation, Dancing, Comedy Club
Prior Traumas
How did it occur
Camping, Gardening, Fishing, Hiking, Hunting, National Parks
Trip to the Doctor or Hospital
Volunteering (Hospital, Medical Facility, Clinic)
Manipulation
Did you see a Movie before the fear began
Chess, Complex Mechanic Repair Activities (auto, clocks, metal working, wood working, drones), Photography, Magic acts, Ventriloquism.
Did you see something on TV or Social Media about Spiders
Chess, Complex Mechanic Repair Activities (auto, clocks, metal working, wood working, drones), Photography, Magic acts, Ventriloquism.
Parent Influences
Were your parents afraid of Spiders
Photography, Chess, Going to Church.
Were they Overly Protective.
Photography, Chess, Sports, Volunteering (Hospital, Hospice), Amusement Park Rides, Rock Climbing, Flying, Parachuting. Going to Church

Once you understand what to do, the next step is to make it personal to you.  It is your personal fears, your personal reactions to those fears, and your specific Joy’s that fit the guidelines.  Only a C type personality would attempt to duplicate this type of analysis.  Most will simply pick one Joy for the Fear. That is all that is necessary.

Here is another option.  If picked a Joy that does not work for you, then choose a different one.  

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